Dear Abby: My aunt and uncle, who are hoarders, have taken over my grandmother’s house
A reader describes relatives who moved in and hoarded much of their grandmother’s house, and asks whether they should intervene given a conflict-avoidant father and the relatives’ frequent babysitting of a young child.
Liam Carter 
A reader from Wisconsin reached out to Dear Abby seeking guidance regarding a stressful family situation involving an aging grandmother and two relatives who have taken over her home.
The Conflict
The reader explains that their aunt and uncle, both in their 50s, moved into the grandmother’s home eight years ago and have since filled half the house with hoarded items. The situation has created ongoing friction for the reader's father, who is described as being extremely conflict-avoidant. To make matters worse, the aunt and uncle are frequently tasked with babysitting a young cousin, which has raised concerns for the reader.
Abby’s Take
Abigail Van Buren notes that the reader’s father has not explicitly stated that he wants outside intervention. Before stepping in, the reader is advised to have a direct conversation with their father to see if he desires any help in navigating the conflict. However, Abby provides a clear directive regarding the safety of the child: If the reader believes the hoarding environment is unsuitable for the young girl, they should bypass the parents and address those specific safety concerns directly with the cousin.
More Advice
For more insights from Abigail Van Buren, you can read more from Dear Abby or browse our collection of other advice columns hosted here on 205focus.com.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
