Dear Abby: My sister’s affair continues while both spouses know the truth
A brother is concerned about his sister’s six-year affair with a wealthy married man who won’t leave his wife, and wonders if he should tell the man’s wife about the relationship.
Liam Carter 
In this installment of Dear Abby, a worried brother seeks guidance regarding his sister’s six-year-long affair with a wealthy man twenty years her senior. Both parties involved are married, and the situation has become increasingly complicated as the sister's husband—who has been informed of the infidelity—now lives separately from her while the two remain legally wed.
Navigating Complex Infidelity
The sister’s lover has made it clear that despite his claims of love, he has no intention of divorcing his own wife, who is currently in poor health. Faced with this ongoing cycle, the brother is considering reaching out to the man’s spouse to disclose the affair. Abigail Van Buren advises against this, warning that interfering will only inflict unnecessary pain on all parties and that the lover has already established he intends to remain with his spouse.
Setting Boundaries with Estranged Family
In a separate inquiry, a reader writes in regarding an estranged sister who has been targeting them with abusive voicemails and text messages. After a tumultuous past, including a bitter divorce and a fractured relationship with her own daughter and grandchildren, the sister appears to be projecting her misery onto others. Abby’s advice is firm: communicate clearly that while you empathize with her pain, you will no longer tolerate the abuse. The most effective course of action is to issue a final warning and then block her communication entirely.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
