Dear Abby: Our son’s controlling wife cut us off and won’t let us see the baby
Parents are heartbroken that their son’s wife has cut off contact with them and kept them from seeing their grandchild. They believe she is controlling him and isolating him from the family.
Liam Carter 
In this installment of Dear Abby, a concerned parent from California reaches out for guidance regarding a heartbreaking family estrangement. The writer, whose 35-year-old son is an engineer, feels their relationship has been severed by his controlling wife. The parents, who previously helped their son purchase a home nearby, report that since his marriage—which went ahead against their advice—their daughter-in-law has isolated him from his entire family, including his siblings.
Navigating Family Estrangement
The writer describes their daughter-in-law as demanding and difficult, noting that the couple now has a child the parents are not permitted to see. The daughter-in-law claims the parents cause her anxiety, a sentiment the writer disputes, as they rarely interact. Abigail Van Buren advises the parents that they cannot force a change in this dynamic. Instead, she suggests focusing on the relationships they maintain with their other children and keeping the door open for a potential future reconciliation without expecting one.
Addressing Unrequited Generosity
In a separate letter, a father from Arizona seeks advice on how to handle his two daughters, who have stopped communicating with him since his divorce seven years ago. Despite the silence, he has consistently sent them $150 checks for birthdays and holidays, which the daughters cash without sending an acknowledgment. He is struggling with the financial burden and the emotional pain of the rejection.
Abigail Van Buren notes that the ex-wife may have colored the daughters' perception of the divorce. She advises the father that the lack of a thank-you note constitutes a breach of manners. Rather than sending a final goodbye letter, she recommends that he cease sending checks and instead send only a nice card for future occasions. If the response to the card is silence, the father will have his answer.
Read more Dear Abby and other advice columns on 205focus.com.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
