Dear Abby: My girlfriend says she is more accomplished whenever we argue

A 36-year-old divorced man reached out to Abigail Van Buren with a difficult dilemma: he feels emotionally overshadowed by his girlfriend of one year. According to the reader, his partner frequently highlights her own superior accomplishments and sophistication whenever the couple enters an argument, leaving him feeling diminished.

The Verdict

Abigail Van Buren did not mince words, identifying this behavior as a form of intellectual bullying. While acknowledging that the girlfriend may be more sophisticated in certain areas, the advice columnist noted that her interpersonal skills are severely lacking. Because she refuses to fight fair, Van Buren warned that the girlfriend is on a fast track to driving her partner away. The recommended course of action is to have a direct conversation with her about these tactics to see if the dynamic can be salvaged.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.